Before we got married, my wife and I got a lot of really good advice from a lot of different people. Much of it boiled down to, “Make sure you communicate with each other and keep God at the center.” That’s good advice that we have tried to implement in our marriage.
But some advice is not so happily accurate. There was some advice that was so beyond stupid that it became ultra-stupid. Here’s a look into the world of marriage advice.
#3. Test drive the car before you buy it
We probably heard this the most. It’s so ridiculous because the whole idea is that you don’t know if you’ll “enjoy sex” with that person and thus your marriage might be horrible! Of course, this assertion is completely and rightly idiotic to anyone who has more than a “marriage is just for sex” mentality. Marriage is a whole heck of a lot more than sex. Besides, God strictly forbids test driving cars before you buy them. (For the sarcasm impaired, that’s a metaphor. Ask your mom.)
Fact: Maybe comparing your future spouse to a car purchase is actually a really horrible analogy.
#2. Life your live before you get married
This is similar to the “test drive your car before you buy it” advice, and it basically implies that marriage is long stretch of dusty boredom, complete with heartache and an early, stressful death. People especially freak out when they learn you’re getting married under the age of 25. “Live your life” in this context often means having lots of sex with random strangers, visiting strip clubs, partying it up, and generally being a debacherous hedonist. Um…no, thanks. Marriage presents a ton of opportunities like getting ahead financially such as an early start on saving for a home/retirement, hanging out with your soul mate all the time, and tons of kids immediately (scared you there, didn’t I!).
Fact: Maybe getting married is part of “living your life”. Mind blown.
#1. Don’t do it!
Finally, the worst piece of advice about marriage is a culmination of the previous two, and that is: don’t get married. This isn’t a, “You should wait until you’re older/more experienced/more mature/whatever.” This is a mindset that marriage is legalized slavery, and getting married is like selling your soul to the devil because it restricts your freedom, blah blah blah. Listen…marriage is great. If you’re not ready for it, then, of course, you should put things on hold until you’re ready. Unless you can’t control your “test driving”. Then get married. Immediately.
Fact: Marriage is awesome. You get to promise your best friend that you’ll always be there and have your best friend in the whole wide world promise you the same thing. So do it!